I lost a friend of the family some weeks ago and it made me wonder..What is death, is there a life after death, should we be afraid of death etc..

I never really believed in heaven. It just seemed unreal that on the clouds there would be golden doors and a man on a big chair who took care of all his children. When I was little I had this idea because of a book I read that an angel would come down to get you while you watched your funeral. The beautiful angel would bring you up to this big golden door. On the other side of the door you could walk on the clouds and look down on the people you hold most dear. You would take care of them. So when I asked my dad where my granddad where he said he was dead and I imagined him laying on the clouds looking down on me. I still like the idea, but now that I’m older it’s hard for me to imagine. I think my head is trying to convince me that is not possible and my heart is trying to say that it doesn’t matter if it’s possible if I believe it then it’s real for me. After life for me is a fantasy something I want to believe in. I think that’s why when people ask if I believe in God I always say yes to get them a short answer. I believe in the after life because it gives me peace. Peace with death – did you ever hear about the term. I know I have, but what I don’t understand is how do you prepare yourself to die, how do you make peace with death? Death is scary and dark, but mostly just silent. I think it’s different for the way you die: When you’re old surrounded by family or when you die suddenly without saying to the people around you that you love them. I understand when your old that you just want peace, but death isn’t always peace it it’s also cold and lonely. When someone die I always think it’s sad no matter when happens, because in my world the person just vanish and whats left is only the persons memory. He/her leaves their love ones and there is nothing and emptiness.

No one is promised tomorrow. The only thing we can count on is today..

Most frightning thing about death is that it can happen any minute. You never know when you no longer is going be here. So you have to live everyday to fullest, but I mean not many does that. They live like they have forever. They never ask the cute girl on a date at work or take that job they always wanted, but needed to ask for. It’s hard to live like it’s the last day, because not many takes chances. It’s about taking the moment to get a happier life. Yolo – You only live ones! or Carpe diem. So cliché terms that you thing they are stupid, but true.

I don’t know if any one you ever watched Supernatural, but in the tv-show death appears as person. I wise person who have to follow faith. An old, but powerful man. Who have seen worse that what we can imagine who are tired of human killing human when we should live our life in happiness. A man who seen all the wars and killing and who just stood be at the sideline and watch us kill ourselves because we couldn’t talk about it or because we seek power. I know it seems a little strange, but I kind of like the idea of an old man with a cute assistant coming to you and telling you to let go. A man who knows more about life than a person who has lived.

I don’t know about death. I mean nobody does. We have our theories, but what we all agree on is that we want to make death safer and maybe okay. I personally just want it to be peaceful and defiantly not realistic. For me it has to be supernatural their most be something more than just emptiness when you die.



The Hunger Games: Catching fire


I went in to see it with three friends and I have never been so nervous. I had no idea if it was good or bad. The only think I knew was that catching fire for the first time I’ve heard about got better reviews than the first. I mean number two is always bad compared to the first one, but not catching fire. It was amazing. It was so exciting. it’s about a month ago maybe i saw and the first thing I do when I come home is to buy it. It was so freaking good i mean wow. If you haven’t seen the first one and because of that didn’t think you could see the second. It doesn’t matter hurry up to see the first one because the go together not that you wouldn’t understand catching fire without seeing the first one, but it just gets better if you see the first one.

I see a lot of movies and this was the movie of year. It had everything a movie should have; excitement, humor, love and a surprising end. It was so good and I’m almost done with mockingly which is the last book. And now Im freaking out, now I really need to see the final movie. Lets just say that it’s a good movie. I really mean see it, it doesn’t matter your age or sex just see it!!!!!

R.I.P Cory Monteith


I don’t know him that well as Cory Monteith I know him because of a Tv-show which gave me hope to follow my dreams and told me to stand out of the crowd. I know him as Finn Hudson. Some days ago he died of a drug overdose. He had so many struggles tat made him do this, but when he acted in glee he felt like he belonged and he felt talented. I just saw the last episode where you see him and I cried. I don’t know why I’m not a fan fan, but I have watch him in glee and that’s enough for me. I maybe overreacting but I feel like I know him even though I don’t even know when his birthday is.

My prayers go out to his family and his friends, but specially I sent my prayers to Lea Michele his co-worker and fiancée  I’m sure that he is in a better place and we’ll miss him.